LALLOUZ INTERNATIONAL MAGAZINE

Dear Rhonda:

My Harry is having an affair. How do I know? I found a card with the name Serena scribbled on the back and a phone number. That’s not all, he comes home late at least 4 times a week and blames it on a new account that he’s working on. His clothes stink of cheap perfume and we no longer have sex. We’ve been married for 25 years, I can’t believe this is happening to me! True, I’ve gained over 100 pounds since we got married, but I thought it was for better or worse, until death do us part. Harry still has his good looks and the body of an athlete. Rhonda, I’m afraid I lost Harry, what should I do?

Doris

Dear Doris:

Don’t you think that you’ve taken advantage of Harry long enough? After all, putting on a little weight is normal, however packing on over 100 pounds is like adding another person to your marriage! Unless you have a medical condition, it is unfair to expect Harry to sit by and watch you gorge yourself to death. What do you do for yourself... work, hobbies, exercise? You can’t be shocked over the alleged outcome of your marriage. Marriage isn’t saying, “I do” and never having to work at it again. People change, they grow and relationships must grow as well. It’s hard work to infuse a relationship with fresh energy, but it is necessary in order to maintain a healthy union. At this point, you have no proof that Harry is cheating on you with some floozy, but if you’re dying to know, then simply ask. Another alternative would be to hire a private investigator, however beware, you may find out more than you really wish to know. My advice to you Doris, is to get off of that couch and join a club. Co-dependency will be the end of you if you do not initiate some form of independence and self respect. If Harry died tomorrow, life would go on, and so must you!

“To possess the ability to express oneself in a way that can enrich the mental perception of others, is truly a remarkable trait that bears great power. Hence, it is via my literary works that I deliver tolerance to those who fear by way of nescience.”

-Contessa Rhonda von Sternberg

Dear Rhonda:

My boyfriend Jimmy is a mamma’s boy. If we go out to a movie, his mother comes along. If we go out to dinner, she’s there. When we’re invited to friends, along comes the mamma. Now we’re planning a vacation and I heard her talking about coming too! I’m nuts about Jimmy, but how much can I take?

Gina

Dear Gina:

I have but one question -- where does mamma want to go on your honeymoon? Wake up Gina, Jimmy is a mamma’s boy! You may ‘be’ nuts about Jimmy, but you shouldn’t have to ‘go’ nuts. There’s one too many in this love affair -- maybe you should duck out for a while and see how Jimmy and his mamma ‘fare’. If not, it may just end up being “farewell Jimmy”!

Dear Rhonda:

My neighbor Jerry is so rude. Sometimes he says hello and other times he ignores me. When he needs a favor, he’s all polite. Last week, he asked if he could borrow my lawn mower because his was broken. He returned it on empty. Not only am I out the money for a refill, but I’ve got to take time away from my schedule to do it. Next time he comes ‘round, and he will, what should I say? I don’t want to be the bad guy here!

Bill

Dear Bill:

One would hope that Jerry would have the decency to refill the gas. Obviously, Jerry is oblivious to everyone around him. Although you have the right to be upset, you can’t fault him for not being bright enough to know right from wrong. Let it go, but the next time he comes around, just tell him it’s in repair. Once, twice, even three times and he’ll get the message. Bill, sometimes it’s just not worth the effort of having to explain the basics of etiquette to others, let alone fighting over a few bucks. Jerry is your neighbour, so it would be in your best interest to diffuse the situation by ‘not creating one’. A nod of the head as you drive off or a simple wave as you come home. Keep it civil. After all, you can’t win with a fool!

Writer, columnist, critic and 'as a poet’, Contessa Rhonda von Sternberg, also penned R.L. Sternberg, has enamoured some of the most elite circles by way of words. An avid Patron of the 'Societal Art Milieu’, Sternberg's literary conceptions are governed primarily by social issues. She takes pleasure in sharing her profound thoughts with her readers. Please send your letters to 'Help me Rhonda' Advice Column via email: Editor@LallouzInternational.com